Being a female leader means being asked the dreaded question…

Over the summer, writer Lauren Groff gained a lot of attention for her polite but firm response to a question from an interviewer.

I get it, I really do — I have often felt the same.

Back when I got on the Hindustan Unilever board, I was the first woman in 100 years to get on the board.

I was invited to sit on a lot of panels. And everywhere I went, there would be three or four men on the panel with me. They’d get all the good questions and then I’d get asked how I balance my work and my life.

One time I got really angry and refused to answer.

One time I got really angry and refused to answer.

But then India Today asked to do a cover story on my personal life. I asked them, “Why would you want to? None of the men get asked to do stories about their lives. Why do you want to know about my personal life instead of my work?”

The journalist told me that the day I got appointed to the board of HUL, India Today got letters from readers wanting to know about me. She told me: there aren’t enough role models out there for women in work.

And so I talked about my background, I talked about my life, about having children about running marathons, about work-life balance.

These days things are a little different. Now I get asked the good questions when I’m on a panel, just like the men.

But I still get that question too.

These days when people ask me, I don’t resent it. Now I understand that being visible, being human, being a role model, is a small act I can perform that might just inspire others around me.

Until men are seen as responsible in raising their children too, true gender parity will be impossible.

But, just like Lauren, I want to see men being asked the same question. Because until men are seen as responsible in raising their children too, true gender parity will be impossible.

My boys have seen me as a role model, and I have a fantastic relationship with them. I talk about things that matter with them. But my husband, their father, is also an important role model. He shares the chores around the house, he plays an active role, and he’s a diversity and inclusion champion for his sons.

So to all the men reading, I ask this:

If you ever find yourself sitting on a panel and you hear a woman on the panel being asked this question, please offer an answer too.

Because, just as it was for me, being visible, being human, being a role model, is a small act you can perform that might just inspire others around you.

Please join me on LinkedIn for more